randomknowledge

     I am often left wondering, why do people drink and drive. I have been to many, many accidents in my time and when the driver has been drinking, they are always basically okay. Do these people have common sense.  I don’t know, when I go out to drink, which is rare, I always make arrangements to either have someone drive me home, or I stay where I drink. No not at the bars, that would just look like I was an alcoholic. Which I am certainly not. I don’t go to bars. Please people when you make plans to drink, how about make a plan to stay where you drink. You could save a life.

It is not always the driving part that is an issue either. We have continual drunks in our town who drink and stumble; Sometimes into traffic, or the road. When we arrive, they stumble into us. Trust us, you are not good looking or hot when your drunk. I know that alcohol affects the brain in various ways, Just because your drunk you have to remember that we are not. You smell, you drool, you lean, your words make no sense, but hey I sometimes get a laugh.

There are two types of drunks, Everyone knows what I am talking about. Whether you are a police officer or not. You know the type of people I am talking about. The first is the one who is walking, or stumbling around. Talking to everyone. This is the guy who will come up to you and tell you that he loves you. That he’s having an awesome time. His eyes are very glossy, bloodshot. Might even fall into you and then laugh about it. This guy is generally harmless, but just so you know, It does get irritating after several hours of you repeating yourself. Don’t worry though, you will always be invited to the party because like I said, you are basically harmless and people can get a good laugh from you. However if the police get called to wherever you are, please don’t tell us that you love us. We really don’t want to shake your hand, not this after this many hours of you drinking. We know that you have probably urinated outside multiple times by now, which means you have not washed your hands. So, even though you won’t remember, we don’t want to shake your hand. When your sober, please feel free to shake our hand. Tell us we are doing a good job, but please not after hours of drinking and peeing.

The second guy is the one who will be talked about the next day. He is the one who drinks the heavy stuff, They have one type of drink that they know, and every else knows that he is not allowed to drink. But hey after several hours of the beer, one small drink of the heavy stuff is okay. Then one turns into half a bottle. This is when he turns into the tough guy, His brain at some point must fall out of his head during one of the times that he has fallen. Sometimes into the fire. Thankfully someone with a brain pulls the moron out of the fire, or the ditch that he has fallen into. Minus the brain of course. So here comes tough guy, and we all know you can’t be a true tough guy without first taking your shirt off. This is your first inkling that he is in fact the tough guy. NO SHIRT is the first sign. Then he starts talking crap. Willing to fight with anyone, for anything. IF you are a bystander, you will probably stand away from this guy, just to watch what kind of crap he is going to do. Wondering with everyone else around you, ‘Why was he invited again’. We will be called and he will, as long as he can, fight with the police. Let me just tell you something, no matter how hard you fight us, we are not going to give up fighting with you. Don’t think for a second that if you fight with us that we will back down and leave. That is not our job. This night is going to end with you being arrested. We charge you with everything we can.

Now for everyone riding in the back of the patrol car on this adventure with me. This is the part not many people get to see, so here we go. The guy is in the back seat, first telling me how he was not fighting with me. He is trying to be nice, because again he thinks by some miracle his sudden kindness will make my heart get all warm and fuzzy and I will just let him go. But I gotta give it to you, you will never know unless you try I guess.

So the guy is, being nice. I never talk or even acknowledge the guy at this point, because talking to a guy like this is completely useless.  I head to the station, and if I did not have back up with me, then another officer meets me at the station. In my town there is only one officer on at a time. ..So as we drive to the station the guy is mad that I have not let him out of the cruiser, so he starts to tell me that I had no right to arrest him and he doesn’t know why the PD had been called.  It was of course the other people’s fault. They started their BS with him. When I continue to not speak with him, he tells me that his lawyer is going to sue the hell out of me,the town and hell anyone else his brainless mind can think of at this point. He starts to yell, scream and get really, really pissed. This is when he kicks the partition seperating us. He kicks violently, screaming at this point to anyone who may listen. (Um I don’t think he realizes that he is the only one back there, unless of course YOU, the reader, talked to him). So now I start to get irritated. We arrive at the station, where he again tries to be nice, tells me he has to pee. I chain him to the wall, start talking to him. Now this is the point where he starts to realize that ‘Hey, they really are serious’. He starts to tell me what happens and then he breaks down and cries. (Yeah I know, he doesn’t tell his friends this the next time they talk). Now if the guy gets bailed then he leaves with a very irritated parent/friend. If nobody will answer their phone to bail him, because by this time its about 3am. He goes to jail, which is a 30 minute ride from my town. If he actually does find someone  to answer the phone, they hardly ever come to get him because they have been through this time and time again with this guy. So after we have spent the entire night (From call time, to being done with the report) It is about 4-6 hours later.  Its time to wrap things up for the shift. Paperwork goes to court, guy goes to court. Then we wait to hear from court for a date for trial, if there is one. If not, then we never really find out what happened to the guy. Until of course he attends another party, where the guy AGAIN drinks the one forbidden drink.

Well that is the end of that shift. Thanks for riding. If you don’t know of anyone who acts like the second guy. Then it’s probably you. Step away from the drink so the police don’t have to meet Mr.Tough guy. Thank you.

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